How to Take Responsibility for Your Part in the Breakup and Move On

by Lynn Smith-Lovin | Last Updated: April 18, 2022

Everyone has a role to play in the end of a relationship. Sometimes, no matter how hard you try, things just don’t work out. Your partner might be the one to end the relationship, they might be the one who’s left. Sometimes, it’s just not in your hands. In some relationships, one of the partners might want to end it. At other times, the breakup might be mutual. Regardless of the reasons for the split, there’s no getting around the fact that endings are never easy. You might be sad about the breakup, you might feel angry, or you might be trying to come to terms with what went wrong in the relationship. Regardless of how you feel about the split, you’ll need to take responsibility for your part in what happened. Breaking up with someone is never easy, so take some time to figure out why things went wrong. Here’s how you can take responsibility and move on.

woman taking responsibility in breakup

Both parts have a certain degree of responsibility

Take the Time You Need

Spending a long time wallowing in sadness is never a good idea. It can make you feel worse about yourself, it can lead to a very unhealthy mindset, and it might just end up prolonging the healing process. Breakups are hard, but they don’t have to last for months or years. Try to take it easy on yourself. If you’ve been hurt, you might be very tired and in need of a lot of sleep. Spend as much time as you need doing that. It’s OK to take time away from your job, school, friends, and family if you’re really hurting. Put space between the breakup and the current situation.

Know What Went Wrong

Breaking up is never easy, but there are usually a few things that go wrong in any relationship. Why did it happen? What could you have done differently? It’s OK to be angry about the breakup, but don’t keep blaming your partner. Take responsibility for your part in the breakup, and don’t let yourself get dragged into the past.

Be Honest

If you’ve been hurting, it’s possible that your partner might have noticed and thought something was wrong. It’s OK to say so, and it’s OK to say that you need some time to heal. You don’t have to do this alone.

Your partner might have had their reasons for wanting to end the relationship. No matter what you think you might have done wrong, this doesn’t apply to everyone. If your partner is ending the relationship, it might help to have a conversation about what went wrong. You might have different ideas about what went wrong.

You’ll need to be honest with your friends and family as well. There are a few things to keep in mind. Don’t keep talking about the breakup in detail. Avoid talking about the issues that led to the breakup. Be careful about sharing too many details about your own feelings, especially if you’re angry about the breakup.

Don’t Dwell on the Past

It’s important to avoid dwelling on the past, but it is OK to talk about your feelings about the breakup. You don’t have to bottle everything up for the rest of your life. There are many online and in-person resources for people who are trying to move on from a breakup and deal with their feelings.

It’s OK to talk and share your feelings, but you should not let yourself fall into the past. One way to avoid this is to think about ways you can use your skills and experience to help other people. This doesn’t have to be related to relationships. It could be anything from helping someone with a computer problem to helping with a problem at school or work.

Stay Active and In Touch

It’s important to stay active and in touch with friends and family, but don’t let your feelings about the breakup take over your life. It’s OK to need time and space to heal, but don’t let them get away from the important things too. It’s OK to miss your friends. It’s OK to miss your family. It’s OK to miss your partner. Make time for yourself, and don’t let the breakup dictate your every waking moment.

Man calling ex after breakup

Make sure to have a proper closure before moving on

Keep active in your hobbies and interests. This could be joining a club, going to a social event, or taking a class. It’s OK to miss your partner and miss talking to them, but don’t let the relationship take over your life. Keep yourself busy with the things you love doing.

Ask For What You Need

If your partner ends the relationship, it might be tempting to try to make things work. You might want to try to fix everything you see as wrong with the relationship. It’s important to remember that this is your partner’s choice, and it’s important to respect their decision.

If your partner is ending things, it’s important to ask for what you need. There are a few things to keep in mind. It’s important to remember that you are allowed to feel upset and angry.

It’s OK to have a conversation with your partner about what you need to feel happy and comfortable again. It’s OK to ask for things like space and time off work, time off school, spending time with friends and family, and time to heal.

Learn From Your Mistakes

As difficult and upsetting as breakups can be, they can also be a chance to learn. Why did it happen? What could you have done differently? What did you learn from the breakup?

Breakups are difficult, but they can also be a chance to learn from mistakes. It’s OK to feel sad and angry about the breakup, but it’s important to learn from mistakes. Breakups are a chance to learn from mistakes and to improve your relationship skills in the future.

learning from mistakes after breakup

Take note of your mistakes and learn from them

Move On

Breakups are never easy, but they can be survivable. You need to take responsibility for your part in the breakup, and you need to move on. It might be helpful to try to focus on the good things in your life. This could be the people in your life who matter most. It could be the things you love doing. It could be the things that make you happy.

Frequently Asked Questions
How do you identify your own mistakes?

Be specific about your errors. Take responsibility for your actions, and be specific about your errors.
Do not let your mistakes define you.
Let go of the fear of failure.
Reshape your goals.
View Mistakes as Opportunities.

How do you handle guilt from a breakup?

It’s natural. It’s human. Very few people want to hurt the people they care about, even if it’s inevitable. It can make you feel really selfish. Sometimes it’s as simple as asking for forgiveness.

How do I identify narcissistic behaviour?

A narcissistic disorder is a condition with traits that may include an excessive need for attention, an inflated sense of self-importance, and a lack of empathy. Someone who is narcissistic may be excessively concerned with their appearance or have little time for focusing on others.